Sexism and Gender Inequality:

Research is clear that sexism and gender inequality is a widespread problem that affects people at home, in the workplace, and in relationships. Some experiences of gender inequality are blatant and obvious. Others are subtle and hard to identify, but significantly impactful nonetheless. The hardest to understand and unpack are often the patterns of sexism that run deep in family systems and impact children from a young age. No matter where it is coming from, experiencing sexism is painful.

Sexism is the deep belief that one sex is better than the other sex. However it can go even further than that. Sexism can be a deep hatred for a certain sex. It is often embodied as deep beliefs that a certain sex is bad, weak, not valuable, or undesirable. Sexism can appear and impact people in many different places including the work place, intimate relationships, or extended family. However, one of the most damaging places is when an immediate family member or parent treats another family member with sexism. 

Most people who are sexist will not come out and say “I hate females, and have never met a female that is equal in my opinion to a man.” Most will not say directly: “I like your brother more than you because you are a female.” Or “I can’t connect with you or bond with you because you are a male and I am repulsed by masculinity.” However, people’s beliefs about gender run deep and play out in thousands of subtle ways. A person who is sexist can pass on the message that your gender is bad, undesirable, and because you are female (or male) you are undesirable and I reject you.

The pain and trauma of being treated with sexism often times can deeply affect ones self esteem and identity. Negative beliefs about femininity or masculinity can lodge deep within and make oneself reject and hate on their own feminine or masculine qualities. Our therapist specialize in unpacking those internalized negative beliefs and bringing healing.

Sexism and gender inequality can cause:

• depression

• anxiety

• -low self esteem

• -PTSD

• -self harm

• -suicidal thoughts

• -relational stress and conflict

• internalized shame

Examples of sexism and gender inequality:

• A father telling his son not to cry because that’s what girls do and he needs to be a strong man.

• A mother connecting closely with their daughter but neglecting their son because they do not know how to connect in the same way to maleness. 

• A father publicly praising all of their sons accomplishments but never mentioning their daughters accomplishments.

• A mother telling her son to apply for that Ivy League school because he is so capable but not encouraging their daughter to do the same. 

• A female who loves athletics but is never taken seriously because sports are male dominated. 

• A family member listening more intently to what the men say in conversation because their opinions and thoughts are more important that if a female in the room has something to say. 

• A boy whose passion and talent is in fashion design but he is continually shamed because fashion is feminine and he should not like what is feminine. 

• A girl not being invited on a camping trip with her brothers even though she is more passionate about survival in nature than they are.

All of these messages tell people or kids that their desires are bad, their thoughts and feelings are bad. Something about their femaleness or maleness is bad. It rejects them, it rejects their beliefs, and forces a person to reject themself if they are going to please their external world.                       

Summary

There is a lot to be done in society to further gender equality. However, we believe it is important to start with the individual and work to heal the damage done so that it does not continue to be passed on from generation to generation. We believe the mental health community should be stepping up and providing specialized therapy support for this struggle. If you think you may be affected by sexism and want to explore its affects on you and your core beliefs and identity then come in and meet with one of our therapists who specialize in this. Our therapists can guide you with the right questions, and help you understand and heal from the pain of sexism and gender inequality.

Disclaimer: The above information is in no way a description of sexism causing one to become Transgender. There is no widespread evidence to support that claim. It is also true that sexism and gender inequality may affect transgender individuals differently than cisgender individuals. We offer support to all people in the fight against gender inequality and sexism.